I want incredibly mundane insults like “you look like you have a terrible handshake.”
My absolute favorite…
You’re not pretty enough to be that dumb
I once said stop acting like you’re beautiful
Oh hon,
You’re not pretty enough to have that type of personality
You’re not good looking enough to be that much of a narcissist.
I was playing TF2 the other day and someone senta message in chat that was just a link to a state unemployement benefits page lmao.
I love TF2 but haven’t played it for a while. Is it still holding up? I heard there are a lot of bots now :/
Valve finally got off of their ass last year and fixed a ton of crap and pretty much banned all of them. Haven’t seen any since.
They also open sourced the SDK so most of the updates include a ton of community bug fixes
That’s good news! I should install it back.
Awesome!
Two I like from history:
A lady called Winston Churchill drunk. Churchill replied: “Madam, I may be drunk, but you are ugly. I shall be sober in the morning.”
Robert Muldoon, Prime Minister of New Zealand, when asked about the migration of NZers to Australia replied “Well, it raises the IQ of both countries.”
I shall be sober in the morning.
Highly doubt lmao
That dude had a mission to be constantly buzzed.
Scotch for breakfast, champagne for lunch, don’t even talk about dinner…
For a few minutes, anyway…
For about five minutes as he slowly shambles his enormous body out of bed
“The young gentleman is an excellent ration powered space heater.”
Heard this back in basic for a young officer cadet who was absolutely useless aside from the fact that they were capable of heating up a ten person tent via their normal body heat.
Heard a new one related to men dating women way too young for them: “Those old men walkin’ around with embryos”
From a goodwill cashier
Until hearing you talk, I never thought lobotomies could make people smarter
“I bet we’ll see you on the news someday.”
Couldn’t happen to a better person.
(After a trajedy or mishap)
Don’t argue with that guy, he’s the Joe Rogan kind of smart.
To a performer: “Every time you perform is better than the next.”
To anyone: “I find you argumentative and easily offended.”
Best part of an insult is heading off the retort.
The comments have devolved into the less mundane and just regular insults, so I’ll throw this one in here:
You’re as thick as a brick sandwich
“Your family tree is a circle”
Ouff thats worse than “ur family tree looks like a telephone pole”
I wish that for just one time you could stand inside my shoes
And just for that one moment I could be you
Yes, I wish that for just one time you could stand inside my shoes
You’d know what a drag it is to see you
Bob Dylan, Positively 4th Street
Great song. Never released on an album either, only as a single (then later on Greatest Hits compilations)
‘you’re not like other people are you?’
‘you know how everyone hates the French? Even the French hate you…’
‘you’re not like other people are you?’
I don’t find this one inherently insulting. I’d probably say thanks.
It’s all in the delivery, there needs to be a level of sustain, disgust or confusion in the last part.
Any variation of phrases where you express disappointment in someone/something
