To fix the networking you could get a dedicated USB print server or a RasPi with CUPS and attach the printer via USB. Probably cheaper than a vintage printer network card.

Judging by the amount of dicks drawn on walls in Pompeii, shitposting tradition spans millennia. I wouldn’t discount it.

Your daily weather forecast likely runs on FORTRAN. It’s quite terrible code in many places because the people writing it are not software engineers but meteorologists, mathematicians, or physicists with little to no formal training in software design writing a million-line behemoth.

And FORTRAN adds to the suck because it is superbly verbose, lacks generics, has a few really bad language design decisions carried over from the 60’s, and a thoroughly half-assed object model tacked on. As a cherry on top, the compilers are terrible because nobody uses the language anymore – especially the more recent features (2003 and later).