I’m also undiagnosed, which doesn’t mean I’m any less autistic. What exact harmful behaviour did op say he wanted to excuse by being supposedly autistic? Look, I know what you say comes from a good place, but all you’re doing is throw accusations around because you ‘kinda know what you’re talking about’, whatever that’s supposed to prove. I agree with you, autism isn’t a disability in and of itself, but it can disable you, in certain cases, because what you call ‘human variation’ isn’t how most people are or act, and it can lead to feelings of ostracism and also isolation. While I believe being diagnosed is usually the better option, not everyone has the opportunity to be, for many reasons. And yeah, separating false self-diagnoses from reals ones is ideal, and using autism as an excuse is, well, inexcusable. But op’s situation seems genuine to me, and your reaction which, again, surely comes from a good place, isn’t helping anyone.
nowherelord
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You’re being very judgmental, and I don’t think it’s getting anyone anywhere. The way I see it, op only meant he was tired of hiding his autistic traits. He didn’t go on saying he’d ignore every social convention. You are right about people who use their condition to excuse their behaviour, but that’s not what’s going on, here. If you need op to clarify his position, do so, but don’t start making assumptions and pass them as truth.
I should definitely try consulting. I’d say work gets in the way, but honestly, it’s mostly a question of breaking my routine of going to work everyday, not work itself. I’m not pro-job and I think everyone (including me) is dispensable, that the job will be done whether or not I’m there, but choosing something that doesn’t fit into my routine is a big work in progress.
That alright, sometimes all we need is to externalize what we think or feel inside, and I think it can be easier here, with people we share similar experiences with, even if we’re all strangers to one another. If anything, I think it’s even easier specifically because of this.
You’re quite right. For me, crying is something I rarely do, mostly because I find the intensity of it hard to manage/control. Not that I’m bottling anything inside, I just find other ways to express myself which I finds easier to deal with. But yeah, we all need an outlet for how we feel, each in our own ways.
Thanks a lot! I’m happy therapy works for you. We all need help, sometimes.
You’re right, the word ‘limitation’ sounds better than ‘shortcomings’; it’s the difference between ‘struggling with’ and ‘not being able to’, which is more in line with what’s really happening. Makes it easier to work around it and prevents us from beating ourselves up constantly and thinking we’re always failing when all we need is more time (and sometimes effort) than neurotypical people.
I get what you mean. This kind of neurodivergence rarely comes alone, sadly… It can be hard pinpointing where our feelings/reactions come from.
You’re right, but we have to; we can’t let ourselves get disorganised every time something bad happens to us. It’s far too easy to just roll with it and say we can’t help it, but we need to be better than this. I know it’s hard to find the right balance between acknowledging our shortcomings and beating ourselves up over them, though.
Yeah, we all need to release our emotions somehow. It’s just hard to find the right balance between expressing ourselves and letting our feelings run amok.
Your taco nachos look delicious, by the way!
I guess you’re right; this anger is part of me, swallowing it will only make things worse. I need to tell myself that at least I’m not expressing it in a toxic or destructive way.
I guess it’s indeed a learning opportunity for me, and also to be able to better support my son when it also happens to him, for different or similar reasons.
Thank you for your comment, it means a lot.



I guess it’s not my first rodeo, so yeah, you could say I did well, considering how it could’ve turned out. Still, I could live without relatively benign situations driving me up the wall. But thanks for the compliment, I’ll take it!