Not my looking like a psychopath to my husband deleting my long time google account to set up a burner (because i cant even use maps/tap to pay without one).

I’m tired of being tracked. Being on lemmy I’ve gotten multiple ideas to help negate these apps/tracking models. I am ever greatful. Theres stil so much more I need to learn/do however.

There have a been a few times over the last few years, that my “bullshit- this is an extemist plant/propaganda” meter has gone off for left leaning individuals.

Meaning these comments/videos are aimed to look like they are left folks, but are meant to make the left look bad/extremist in order to push people from the working class movements.

Im truly a layman, but you just know its out there. The goal is indeed to divide us, and everyone should be suspect of everything the see on the Internet and do proper vetting of their sources.

Target was my first job a few years after this happened to you. While my favorite is how nearly all retail will only give you 34 hours maximum so they don’t have to give you benefits, while also having you work a different shifts each day, with never two days off in a row, and that schedule is going to never be the same two weeks in a row- making it impossible to live a normal life or work a second job-

While thats so cool of these companies, Target is were my first cry and the hands of a customer happened. This white dude suit comes though my line, he’s with a young person, and he was buying basically out entire “back to school” (college) section. Hundreds of dollars.

His card declined. It didn’t just decline, it asked to call a number to get the transaction approved. I, as a teenager myself, tried to explain. This man berated me like no one ever did since to be honest. He pulled the “I make more money than everyone in this room combined”. He was mean.

My manager was really good about it when she came to help me. She even let me take an extra break after. Ill never forget that interaction. “What radicalized you”, this was one if them. Basic Human decency is free. What was he teaching that college aged kid in that moment? Why do some people tie money to whether or not you are a good person? I’ll never understand.

Anyway, about 7 months later I walked out due to this dumb bitch Amanda, power tripping square, who was just mad her crush liked me and not her. I didnt like him back, but she was targeting me for it. I said fuck this and fuck you to her face, and walked out mid shift.

Target sucks balls. I’ve never made enough money to shop there with any real consistency anyway.

The thing is, when you speak to red hats on an individual level, the person you commented said they want the same basic safety and quality of life we do. I agree, this is true.

Where it strays is folks in power have preyed on the ignorance of the most blue collar, “School is for yuppies” “never lived anywhere but the boonies/sticks” kind of people.

The propaganda worked on them. They were targeted by this regime for decades, and it’s finally manifested.

Of course I speak on a macro level, because on a micro level I’ve cut out every racist/bigot in my life. Propaganda is a hell of a drug, and not everyone finds value in education which helps you spot it. Its a mess for sure

Folks here think regulation, and immediately put it to food and Ai or other white collar applications.

Working in plastic manufacturing for ten years, and chemical manufacturing for a few more, the term deregulatuon terrifies me. Regulations keep employees safe, and aims to keep the products we make safe.

I think of environmental impacts first and foremost, which is the kind of deregulation I assumed was meant with this regimes obsession with bringing back coal, oil, and mining/deforestation if our national parks.

Getting money out of politics is implemented with regulation. We only have one environment, and they want to deregulate environmental safety/preservation.

Everyone is different. I was never vegan, rather considered myself plant based because I allowed both local eggs and local honey in my diet (still do) but no other animal products. Did this for many years until a coworker made a lunch of local hunted venison for a staff meal, and well, I’m mostly against the industrial farming practices, this was technically ethical hunting. This man was part of our local indigenous tribe, so I indulged as not to be rude. It was a great meal honestly. Everyone gawked I was eating meat. And I spoke often about the industrial process of meat farming to try and educate, but ultimately if these people wanted to feed their kids cheetos wrapped in bacon for breakfast, nothing I could say would change that, and its not my place to chastize.

I never understood those who chastized others for trying.

Vegans hated me because I like using local honey in spring to help with my hay fever. Which I have right now :( Nevermind I haven’t had beef in years, I eat eggs from pet hens so a vegan gonna scream at me online. Yay. That will motivate me… sure thing.

The method of education isn’t going to work, and culture tied to meat cooking is so strong. Personally, giving up cheese, tbh, was really hard. Hummus wraps were the only thing that worked for me to satiate that urge for cheese. Vegan cheeses isnt it, idk why hummus wraps worked for me but it was much harder to give up cheese than butter or meat. I had to put a lot of effort to not cave to that kind of dairy at first. And im sure others have their own hang ups as well, it can be difficult, like quitting a vice.

Cultural change is slow (historically).

To note, After a number of years, a vegan friend of mine stopped being vegan. I think he was depressed, idk, but- we went to Wendy’s. I wasnt going to get anything, but he prodded, and I fucking caved to a pub burger with bacon on a pretzel roll and… my mouth had an orgasm, I swear to god. I got three more that week, realized they really do engineer this stuff to be so addictive. I questioned myself, what thefuck was doing? I had to stop this, and cut the behavior out just as fast, only because I could identify what was happening. Not everyone can.

Idk my point other than everyones journey will be different, but shaming folks isnt the ticket to healier environmental impacts always. Like I said, certsin vegans have shamed me for still consuming eggs and honey like it wasnt hard for me to give up cheese. Like telling an alcoholic they still suck because they drink soda. Its defeating.

I guess you can have 255 grams of poultry

Hell yeah

The solution is not moving country. God if it were that easy.

I want to add, the fist time i binge ate, i was 8 years old. My guardian had a snack draw, full of all the 90s kid corn syrup you could want. We were to pack two for our lunches each day. My guardian was a severe misogynist, and even at 8, i was angry all the fat boys in media were clowns and funny and liked, and the fat girls were basically conveyed as trolls.

I remember hearing “growing boys need to eat”, and at 8(edit maybe i was 10), i thought, im growing too, why cant i eat? And i ate up that snack draw. It was my first protest to “girls should only eat things they look cute eating”.

I like to think if i had a proper mother maybe that wouldnt have happened. But the mother i had, i saw once a month and didnt eat ant veggies, was thin, but meat and potatoes is all she ever ate, water tasted bad to her and she only drank coffee. She was never a big part of my life. But my misogynist guardian was, and thus began my disorder. “Mayo puts hair on your chest; women are weak and stupid, i dont date fat women” ect I would hear and it would piss me off. I got fat, and i was the “daughter” he didnt rape. It protected me, in a way, but ive a mouth and i wish he would have tried, i could have gotten us kids out sooner.

As a teen hed throw fast food at me and call me names while i was confined to my room, not even allowed out by the end, to use the bathroom.

I have c-ptsd, and now at 37 still fucking stuggle with it. I just wish i could live somewhere walkable, and i miss my 20s when i did live in a place like that.

I did.

I was big growing up because my guardian literally kept me in my room, threw McDonald’s at me and called me a fat bitch. I was allowed to go to school, and go to my room from age 12-16. When he was arrested i lost 60 pounds, gained it back though. Then when i was 21 i lost 80 pounds in 11 months, i worked hard, rode my bike to work.

Then, I got pregnant at 25. Gained for that- but lost it all fast with nursing and maintained healthy weight until the pandemic. I liked hiking, and riding my bike to work, and ate whole foods, i had, had fast food a whole 3 times since i was 21. … until i was 32. My male coworkers ate bk for lunch every day, they were thin, our work was hard (i lifted and packed approx 2000-3000 pounds of material we made a shift), so i started getting Bk too. And i got fat.

The pandemic hit and my now husband got the unemployment, so he ordered restaurant food nearly 5x a week. I left my job to support my kid. I peaked my weight again.

Now, at 37 years old, with a special needs child, no walkability in my neighborhood, and no car (we have one car and he works a lot) to drive to the trails… my son at seven, stopped liking hiking anyway, i find myself stuck in my house. (The last time i took him he literally just layed down in the beginning of the trail and refused to move, its kind of funny now). This also was when hubs was ordering hella food, id get a salad or whatever but fries are just, a god. Anyway

I live a pretty isolated life. I signed up $40/month for a gym with a pool and was swimming last year, but when i only have a one hour window (with the car) to go a day, and the pool schedule being what it was, i stopped going. Excuse? Sure, but i always found it easist to lose weight and exercise when it was baked into my life, and not like, going to the gym, i dont want people to see the fat girl run, even when i was 21 i would run my neighborhood at night so people couldnt see me. But i liked the pool, i just cant get there without a car, which i dont have. My bike is broken, i sont onow how to fix it, and cant afford to, and like i said, you come out my little neighborhood, its immediately highway. I walked with ny son up there one day to try and go somewhere, and someone took a right on red, when we had the crosswalk, and nearly hit us. All you could hear was cars, and smell exhaust- truly aweful pedestrian experience.

Im back on whole foods, but its not really what i eat now, its seditary lifestyle. “So get out there!” One might say, i have highways on two sides of me, and an airport on the other, and a swamp on the otherside. My favorite local grocer is .6 miles from me measured directly through the swamp to the strip mall, you have to take a highway to get there. It’s so frustrating, i would walk. I really would. I struggle to work out on my own, my husband is tall and thin, and hates working out, so im on my own. Thats the hard part. Im keep eating my veggies and whole foods and continue to work on it, since i turned 32 my goal is to get fit again by 40.

My husband got a sword and i was messing around with it, and realized my arms have gotten weak, so just this week i started doing push ups. Or even just trying to hold myself up in that planking position. I work on my binge eating disorder with my therapist because, being alone in the house, with no friends to invite me anywhere, just readig the Internet some mornings, is enough to say, "I don’t care I’m making nachos for breakfast, it doesnt make dishes, i dont feel like cleaning the god damn cutting board and doing dishes. I do em all by hand, and when you cook from scratch, dishes are… plentiful.

Anyway, i know its the best thing. I remember when i could run without getting winded, the energy i had, I refuse elevators and take the stairs at my therapist office, and i get mad im winded when i reach the top. Got tree work to do this week, idk. It’s not that im lazy, my binge really is just fucking nachos, and about six months ago, i decided, even if im binge nachos, i make a portion half what i used to, and double the jalapenos.

Youre preaching to the choir on this.

I support mens health.

Ive a million stories of hurt men who didnt deal or heal well with their hurt, and ended up hurting others (and themselves) for it. Usually its some tragic thing that happened when they were young and never dealt with it, because culturally men have been told to shove it down and man up for decades at least. But, I’ve been told many a tragedy from male family members, friends and ex lovers. And then watched them go from victim to abuser, or some other consequence, and its sad

Men should be taught, and allowed to express themselves. Its literally okay to cry, its a process of emotion.

Support fellow humans

Reading this, specifically had me think of an old friend i had. He was always sceming. Every time i saw him he had a new one. Weather he was stealing company supplies from his employer, so he could start his own landscaping business, or asking me to use my doordash account, or wanting me to help him start a flower business, which i never helped with any of it because i dont agree with lying/cheating through life, while every bit of his life seemed some backdoor plan- I would have dated him, once apon a time, but ten years into the friendship, he sent me a ben Shapiro video, a d a few years ago, i terminated the friendship. Every thing was transactional with that man. He was good looking and kind, but my god these traits were such a turn off, I dont care if you work at hime depot, or the hardware store- my husband today is a chef- its better than scheming to rip someone off so you can get ahead. Thats selfish imo.

My first date with ny husband we went on a walk on a trail near our home. We walked for 6 hours lol

As a fat highschooler, ehen, as a fat woman highschooler, i got rejected so many times. Never once did it make me hate and distrust men. Because every person is their own.

I’m sorry. Cabot is better than any store brand I’ve had, I only started buying it because it is regional to me years ago.

There may still be some local cheese brands available to you. Small farm cheese makers make some good stuff. At one point in my life, I didn’t eat much meat or dairy, but when I did, I bought what was local to me, even if it was expensive, and cherished it each time I indulged. I respected that locally made small farm cheese like it was the god of cheeses and gave it utmost culinary respect, while trying to make it last as long as possible.

Suffer on your own terms I say. If you want good cheese, have good cheese, the suffer would be you have less cheese overall, but at least when you do, you know it is quality and supports local makers.

My great-great grandparents fled Europe during WW1 when they were teens.

Did they run away too?

This falls under “suffer on my own terms” for me. I won’t go to Walmart, so we’re going without extras. There’s no cheese in my house right now because none was on sale at my local grocery store. So instead of going to Walmart, or paying $4 for a block of Cabot cheddar at my grocer, the choice is go without cheese for the time being.

Used to shop minimally at Walmart anyway, now I refuse to go. I go to my local co-op 2ce a week now though.

Bulk spices are cheap y’all.